a very dikefest christmas...

Making Christmas eve wishes...

Sheamus told me "mom, all i want for christmas, is you"

what a sweet kid.

...or maybe he just knows how to manipulate the crap out of me.

This christmas I wish for at least one kid that doesn't regularly throw up at the dinner table. Christmas eve was Sheamus's turn...

nestled children....

Surprise!...Santa installed a swing in our front room...

bad idea Santa.

but at least he also brought this spazzy kid a helmet...

Hope your Christmas was a blast :)

team boo ♥'s you

forever young...

Here is our annual year end video.

If you are a Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt or Uncle to TeamBoo, it is a spoiler of your envelope to come.

If not, please enjoy some of our fondest memories of 2009....

by team boo.

{to see last years click here}

team boo ♥'s you

Merry Christmas!!!!

we attended an ugly sweater party.

we won.

team boo ♥'s you

more than a food baby.

27 weeks..................................31 weeks

Sheamus: "Mom are you have three babies??" (taking into account my 2 "ball tummies")

Me: "Nope, just one little baby boy :)"

Sheamus: "Well mom....It looks like you are turning into Santa Clause"

sweet. Here's to being jolly and jiggly (but with slightly less facial hair).

Ho Ho HO.

team boo ♥'s you

never mind the metal chairs...

Here is my latest form of life sucking force:

Christmas party #2

(the first for 30 guests, the second for about 250)

but good news....no contractions!!

I really think a lot more could have been done for bigger impact, but I had a Metric concert to catch, and that stuck a middle finger to any further embellishments.

(Bethlehem had snow and enormous orange basketball hoops...no??)

In the end, I showered, rubberbanded the fly of my blue skinny jeans and stuffed my face with ham before a night with Emily Haines and some mild heart burn.

And at this point in pregnancy, you can't really ask for much more than that.

It's all down hill from here donkeys!!!

team boo ♥'s you

If you say the word "believe" more than 4 times it starts to sound like jibberish.

Sweet Taylor invited me to share a few random things in her "i believe" christmas project.  So it no particular order, here are a few things that came to mind: I believe in God I believe that my boobs will need a surgical lift after this baby is born I believe that most people need to "unclench" I believe kittens should stay kittens forever I believe in being honest in all your doings...including being true to yourself. I believe its okay to eat chocolate every day I believe no matter what happens, you can do it! I believe Clay Aiken makes me feel frightened and cold. I believe there's no such thing as a bad kid...just ones that need more love and listening to I believe that Oprah is a lifestyle Macgyver. I believe my day isn't done until i've gotten my hands dirty I believe its never too late to come to your senses I believe that the color maroon should not exist I believe in eternal families I believe in making love...not beeeeeeds! I hope you're all having a fantastic Christmas season! ...in what do you believe?

team boo ♥'s you

Love me still.

Since i have been SO terrible about posting lately

I thought the least i could do was post a peecture.

These are my brothers and sisters...

Aren't we cute?? (also a little vampire-y)

(if you look closely you will notice my tummy is catching up with my chest...but just barely ;)

I have so many Chirstmas projects I have been working on

Parties (yes more parties while pregnant...i can't stay away.  One down one to go)

...homemade wreaths, woodsy chandeliers, yarn ornaments, fireplaces, mangers, snowy stick trees and more!

stay tuned...

I will type more when my hands heal after working with pine cones

(p.s. they are frigging sharp)

and, of course, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD!!!!

team boo ♥'s you

G is for grandparents....

...to whom this post is dedicated.

its just a bunch of family yaddie yaddie yadda

But, its what gives the grandma's and grandpa's battery power.

It was SOOO nice to visit the cabin!

In true Sheamus fashion, when daddy told Sheamus to go pee right after we arrived...

he stepped one foot out the door and peed on the deck.

And it was already cold enough that

it was still slightly frozen when we woke up in the morning ;)

{G is also for groundhogs day, cause i'm pretty sure i've told this nerdy story before}

Thanks Jeanine and Spencer for creating such an awesome place for the family to get away :)

we miss you!!

say yes to sharing....and Turkey

Instead of Turkey and pie, Adam wants Ham and cookies. 
what a fool.
I love Turkey, I don't care who's eating it...i'm eating it right now.

{click here for more obnoxious turkey fun}

team boo ♥'s you

thank you...have a nice day

In honor of Thanksgiving, I forced my family to make a thankfulness chain.

I worried they might think it was super lame, but we actually had a lot of fun thinking of all sorts of little things we overlook on a daily basis...

Elyott: school, love, grandma and grandpas, colors, cousin Scott

Momma: Tina Fey, music, my home, toilets, humor, turd ice

Sheamus: Andy pants, Travis, eyeballs, wolverine costumes, bottles (??)

Daddy: baby "Uzi", Sports, his bed, technology, nachos

...and it goes without saying, all the real obvious ones like family, a loving Heavenly father and just being alive!! ;)

(Also, i will be thankful if Sheamus gets a hearty meal come Thursday...gawl)

Hope your Thanksgiving is bright!

team boo ♥'s you

come in....

here's to living winter vicariously through photos

(the sheep??...it was white)

“If you are a dreamer, come in…

…if you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar, a hoper, a prayer, a magic-bean-buyer. If you’re a pretender, come sit by my fire, for we have some flax-golden tales to spin. Come in! Come in!”

     — shel silverstein

don't be fooled....

...I no longer look like this.

it was a good 4 weeks ago.

I haven't gotten to taking another side shot, but from based on my (very tactful) neighbor's jaw drop when i told her I wasn't due until Feb....I'm guessing I am popping out quite a bit more.

For all of you who can't wait until February, here is a creepy baby morph that i did online (which is better than the one we did seven years ago in Vegas, where our daughter looked like a 10 year old neanderthal)...

....hmmm?

and for the sake of my half latina baby dream I'll set aside my exasperation with J.LO

("but she knows what she did"*) and bring you this next combo......

(*make any career moves outside of her Selena role.)

meh.

(then her little half J.LO soul would be partially addicted to one piece denim rompers

or playing the "Bronx" card...and that might put me over the edge.)

Have a fabulous weekend my friends...

team boo ♥'s you

more mexican memories...

Adam bought this shirt for halloween last year....when I told him i hated it, he cut off the sleeves and started wearing it as an even sicker beach shirt.

What we learned in Mexico...

1. don't let your kids do flour relay races when they have braids in their hair (water plus four equals glue in your scalp)

2. try not to get hurt in mexico or you will end up in an doctors home office with a mystery shot in your arm and your genitals feeling like they're on fire.

3. pregnancy skin sensitivity will still allow blotchy sun damage through 50 spf on my forehead. 

4. there is nothing that will stop the scrappy mexican birds from shanking food practically right out of your mouth.

5. there is endless privacy for Matthew McConaughey style "beach time"

6. Sheamus has the most awesome perma mad scientist beach hair ever.

7. there is no better way to ensure quality family time than on a remote resort on a stretch of mexican coast....ARRIBA!!

team boo ♥'s you

whip it good.

Every year i get so jazzed for Halloween

and every year I am so frigging sick of it by late October.

Mostly because my house is cluttered and dark with moss and skulls.

...Or is it my kids 47 costume changes?

I fully intended to put together a Bearded Lady gettup.

Or (in me and an my friend Summer's fantasy) members of a roller derby team

But after the Halloween party burnout

I was a little depleted,

and just lucky to not smell like a burlap sack.

{*side note: how awesome was the movie Whip IT ?

how much did it wish you were really really good at roller skating?

and do it while wearing fishnets and red lipstick?

and a reason to have neon streaks in your hair and an alter ego??

For this might be my undiscovered talent...

in that it'd justify my tendency to fall like 900 times while i play sports,

....and also I could elbow people in the face.

oooh and Kristin Wigg and i could finally be BFF's.

And isn't it relieving to see Juliette Lewis pick a movie role around her regular one piece jumpsuit wardrobe and akwardly awesome personality?

Maybe people could call me "Thunderstruck"...

oooh or "Team Bruise"

plus look how much fun they're having...

Wait, what were we talking about?? 

OH yes....Halloween was fun. Though I didn't dress up, my sweet kids did.

see how cute they are...

team boo ♥'s you

How to launch yourself into pre term labor...

1. Agree to head up decorations for a church party

2. Hold said party in an enormous basketball court on a $250 dollar decor budget...(thank you appliance store dumpster) using cardboard, paint and tree branches (without putting ANY new holes in the wall)

3. Decorate party for two days straight

4. All the while bending to paint and jumping up and down a stage 67 times

5. Drink only Pepsi Max for both those days

and VOILA!

...you will find yourself in the hospital triage in no time.

So even though the party was a total success,

as was my body's ability to not dilate through two days of premature contractions, basically I learned

pregnant chicks need to have more helpers and drink more water when throwing a party.

(oops.)

All is well.

(Though I might be swearing off soda for the remainder of my pregnancy)

Mexico is the new black.

We back. And right up front...my apologies to our friends who were subject to my embarrassingly too small bathing suits all week. ...all week where I horizontally sipped mango smoothies, and ate poolside nachos...tucked away on a private beach with not one pregnant dog or drug lord in sight. who knew? thanks for your prayers ;)

(more pictures to come...)

presenting...our vacay soundtrack:

-Jay z (forever young remix) about 73 times in a row the 4 hours there and back (thanks to husband liking the repeat button as much as the children do.)

 -The resorts mexican dance song of the year at least thrice daily "follow tha leada, leada, leada...follow tha leada, woot woot!"

-and Sheamus's rendition of Bon Jovi's "Shot Through the Heart" as follows...."shock to da heart and you're too lame, God give it alooooone a BAND-AID"

By now we are pool side in Mexico.

Don't be scared.

(or do.)

we'll be back soon ;)

date with the night.

What do you do when you arrive at the Build a Bear birthday party a day early?

...you hit up the MAC make up counter, and slather your 6 year old in lipstick shades fit for a hooker, of course.

(*also, I am the worst picture-kiss-facer ever)

the Wolverine-est

How is it that before an ultrasound, one can drink 32oz of water and pee out 82?

*Sheamus wanted the baby in Mommy's tummy to be a girl because he was under the impression that if it were a boy, that boy would be another Sheamus....and he would have to start all over being a baby again. 

*Elyott wanted a girl because....well she is a girl. and girls are awesome. (va jay jay power!)

*Mommy wanted a girl because...she feared another boy could only be more crazy and inevitably less sweet than the boy she already has.  Plus...she's a girl too (and she has had a girl name burning a hole in her brain for years!)

*Daddy wanted a girl because he drinks things like this...(see below) and having a family of girls would make it seem to make more sense??

So guess what??

ITS A BOYIEE!!!

*Sheamus asked if his name would be "Sheamus".  When I said no, he needed double clarification that he is now, and would always be, the "WOLVERINE-EST" and "Logan-est" of ALL!  (but i think he has it in the bag...see above)

*Elyott cried a teensy bit...but is now excited (cause she's the best most understanding big sister of all)

*Mommy's heart melted at the thought of a baby gorilla #2, and then punched herself in the face for ever thinking that she could be less excited by another boy (but damn those boy names!)

*Daddy (who is, by nature, the worst reaction giver of all) is jazzed too, and has absolutely no shame from his drink preferences (if he were a drinker, you better believe it'd be Appletinis all night long)

...and giggling fourth graders all across the land are glad to have another boy who will carry on the Dikefest namesake!

homies, lovers and friends

Even though you always use my toothbrush, cause you forget mine is the green one, and that you happened to have a green toothbrush like 2 years ago (again, french kissing and wiping your tooth scum onto mine are not the same thing)...

...even though you listen to the lamest music, like 2001 style R kelly, so much that our preschooler makes regular requests for the "freakin' weekend song"

...even though you'll willingly let your softball leg wounds ooze into our sheets

...I love you through and through

♥ Happy anniversary lover.

(*and just as two wrongs don't make a right, 

I realize some random drawing and a silly backhanded post don't make a suitable anniversary gift

...but that's how we roll ;)

(p.s. the wedding photo above is basically opposite day of what we looked like at our wedding. I don't even think Adam could have grown a mustache yet....think pregnant teenagers ;) 

fat bottomed girls.

{via 9000 }

As a teen I went through years of insecurity and body image craziness, and it wasn't until after i got married  to a supportive (and completely biased husband ;) that i was slapped into the reality of what my body could do: I had a baby. I know it isn't that way for everyone, but for me, something about that transition in my life completely changed my views on what it means to have a healthy body.  I like to feel good, and look good, but mostly....I just love being around. Yet the problem that lies with public outlets and me, is that I am way to tempted to use self deprication to make connections. And my self loathing thoughts on pregnancy might be my favorite subject (well...that, and inverted nipples, and pointing out my occasional lesbian sounding voice). Fabulously, I fear this has caused less of you to want to grab brunch, and more of you to want to just punch me in the face. For it has been lovingly brought to my attention that my "chubby thigh" and "acne mustache" symptoms might be the anti feministic way to celebrate this miracle....and hell, it's possible they're simply a figment of my imagination (a profession of how i feel rather than the way i look) . So I promise I won't hold it against you if you have recently thought anything along the lines of...

"For the love of Angelina and her overflowing maternal willingness, someone get this girl a muzzle!"

But before I ditch my M.O. and start reciting positive affirmations in the mirror, I'd like to profess that it's humor that gets me through these long months of suffrage. Allow me to be frank...I love myself! I looooooove my babies, I love myself an optimistic confident woman, but I do not love pregnancy....i think it was designed to keep a girl humble.  I consider it my bodily donation to take on the single most honorable venture there is in this life.  And despite the more socially responsible coping techniques that exist, the best way i can think to survive pregnancy (and sometimes just straight up motherhood) is to laugh at how ridiculous it can be. This way, instead of pretending my third trimester double chin is glorious (or worse....not there) I rest assured that since not permanent, it is simply more hilarious than tragic. But as always, thanks for keeping me in check friends!

{tie-dye.

 worst adult clothing invention ever?

or

maternity clothing amazingness?}

wanna hear a way smarter version of this?

...listen here, it is so awesome.

I have been naughty....

Longest hiatus ever!  Even my friends have begun to ask me what the heck was up.  I think it has been playing tricks on me too. I can no longer rely on my online rants to preface a story, I actually have to keep track of who I have told, which for me is like keeping track of how many times I've opened the refrigerator in the last month (after I've forgotten what i walked in the kitchen to do)....for i might be the queen of re-telling worthless information.

And I couldn't be prouder of all my stalwart readers who have stuck by my side! You guys are champs....really ;) I just hope I haven't built this all up too much, cause now i feel all cobwebby and out of sorts. Like a baby deer learning to walk. It may take me a minute to gain some momentum, but in the meantime may i tell you a few tidbits:

-mystery gendered baby and I are both growing whole heartedly (thanks for the well wishing and concerned emails)

-October is maybe my favorite time ever

-My "baby" is 4 today! ...not my fetus baby, rather my baby whose head rests on a well formed neck instead of directly on its shoulders (Quasimodo?).

-today I'm "back" ...and tomorrow NIE is on Oprah!! (I am so Farrah to her Michael ;)  I SO can't wait to watch!

Hooray for comebacks!!!!!

So tired....tired of waiting.

It's hard being super....just take it from this kid. 

No, I am not dead... but i'm also not super. ....therefore, by about 11:00 in the morning, this is how i feel.

Since my "resurrection" or "exorcism" (whichever way you wanna slice it) I have been tending to the (literal) piles around me, the lists, and dangerously backordered attention giving.  I thank you all for not un-following me, as it hurts my blogging soul when i take a break and peeps bail. I have been enjoying the non-computer brain stimulus. 

**Also, forgive me for my total pump fake last week when i posted the Steoffrey/Mangie photo shoot pics. They were burning a hole in my draft box and I just had to share...but then I TRICKED YA cause I'm still on a blogging staycay. That is when I don't post, but I am never too far from my laptop cause...come on. 

I promise, i will be back soooooon.