fat bottomed girls.

As a teen I went through years of insecurity and body image craziness, and it wasn't until after i got married  to a supportive (and completely biased husband ;) that i was slapped into the reality of what my body could do: I had a baby. I know it isn't that way for everyone, but for me, something about that transition in my life completely changed my views on what it means to have a healthy body.  I like to feel good, and look good, but mostly....I just love being around. Yet the problem that lies with public outlets and me, is that I am way to tempted to use self deprication to make connections. And my self loathing thoughts on pregnancy might be my favorite subject (well...that, and inverted nipples, and pointing out my occasional lesbian sounding voice). Fabulously, I fear this has caused less of you to want to grab brunch, and more of you to want to just punch me in the face. For it has been lovingly brought to my attention that my "chubby thigh" and "acne mustache" symptoms might be the anti feministic way to celebrate this miracle....and hell, it's possible they're simply a figment of my imagination (a profession of how i feel rather than the way i look) . So I promise I won't hold it against you if you have recently thought anything along the lines of...
"For the love of Angelina and her overflowing maternal willingness, someone get this girl a muzzle!"
But before I ditch my M.O. and start reciting positive affirmations in the mirror, I'd like to profess that it's humor that gets me through these long months of suffrage. Allow me to be frank...I love myself! I looooooove my babies, I love myself an optimistic confident woman, but I do not love pregnancy....i think it was designed to keep a girl humble.  I consider it my bodily donation to take on the single most honorable venture there is in this life.  And despite the more socially responsible coping techniques that exist, the best way i can think to survive pregnancy (and sometimes just straight up motherhood) is to laugh at how ridiculous it can be. This way, instead of pretending my third trimester double chin is glorious (or worse....not there) I rest assured that since not permanent, it is simply more hilarious than tragic. But as always, thanks for keeping me in check friends!
 worst adult clothing invention ever?
maternity clothing amazingness?}
wanna hear a way smarter version of this?
...listen here, it is so awesome.


Renee said...

Ew. Worst adult clothing ever.

I feel you on the self-deprecation. And I think most get that your bloggy self is only one aspect of the richness that is (probably) you. Also acne mustaches are hilarious.

MaryPosa said...

I get the third trimester double chin too. i've 8 weeks left, and my worst fear is that i'm starting to look like my grandmother. But it always seems to go away. The massive saddle bags on the other hand... can't seem to shake those, no mater how much shakira dancing i do.

Jalene said...

I'm so glad you are back! I've missed you!

boots said...

lol- your hot no matter what! and fat bottom girls is the theme of my newest cute.n.boot card. wait and see :)

geri said...

"for the love of angelina and her overflowing maternal willingness"?!?! i love that line!
you crack me up.
so glad you're back in action.

leigh said...

I hate being pregnant more than I hate anything in the world. My body goes haywire. My armpits smell like pizza.

Of course, I lurve my babies. I just hate growing them. Oh...and pushing them out. I hate that even more!

Hang in there!


Krista said...

thanks for the reminder to laugh more...i need help in that area. i'm nicknamed robot by the hubs b/c i guess i don't show emotion and am too serious sometimes. lame. and for some reason i always get in the frame of mind that things (pregnancy) are permanant and my life is over.

Michelle said...

It seems like all the other things we don't like about our bodies would pale in contrast to the amazing things it can do and create!!

Of course, some of those amazing things (besides the baby-making abilities) are totally contorting and messing with the normal state of our bodies. Which is quite alarming. I don't blame you dwelling a little on the changes no one really wants to tell you about before you get pregnant!!

Broadobalds said...

Glad you're back. You're beautiful.

Brittany said...

Ok I got my necklace and I LOVE it!!!! So much thanks again. So my pictures I take with my iPhone with a application called shake it up. It is amazing if you have one. I am in love with the ap.

Thanks again!!!

Ambs said...


Whenever you are feeling down, or chubby.. just remember that you have set the bar for the "awesome-hott-mom" title for so many women!!

When I grow up I want to be just like you :)


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