back in the saddle.

{picture via Delighted...who is rather delightful herself}

This weekend I made three public appearances (All of which i felt way "too pregnant" to tell people i was only 3 1/2 months along).  I showered, I curled my hair to cover to monster blemishes that are now gracing my complexion, i ate, i laughed, I got the bakery guy at Whole Foods to give me a free Creme brulee (which along with orange creamsicles is my new favorite treat...a sure fire way to be much more ashamed to announce how far along i am next week) I wore makeup, I organized my pantry, the list goes on....

And despite my new rear view renaissance silhouette...it's great to be back!! (FYI: just as two wrongs don't make a right...non elastic jeans and a jersey top don't make an flattering maternity outfit for me)

I made a promise to myself that I would make some changes...inspired by Polished Pickle and Owwy's summer to do lists I am gonna do more of the following as a "back to school list" of sorts:

-begin plans for halloween costume party...if you live in AZ you are invited ;)

-finish 2 concepts on my poster art idea

-learn one three chord song on my guitar

-make a quilt 

-actually plan something special for husband (our 7th anniversary is approaching)

-make dinner for my family three nights a week (this one is haaaaaaard!)

wish me luck!

*Also...look at what you did at the voting polls this week ! To that i say...

"a BOO yah"

"someone just got SERVED a BOO sandwich"

"that's what i call getting BOO-slapped"

see what i did there?? now make a momma proud and don't make me regret coming up with those "catchy" one liners, which by losing will make sound really stupid...but otherwise are very cool ;) 

keep voting!...

you can call me Garth (cause I'm shameless)

Here's the deal.

I know how many visits I get a day

I know how many votes i am behind in the mommy blogger contest 

and I know that most of you are holding out on me 

So now i am resorting to the ugly face of "informal palm greasing"

{which according to my computer thesaurus, is WAY more awesome way of saying "bribery"}

and here's how it will go down:

The grand prize for the mommy blogger winner is a bunch of awesome free shwagg 

{no disrespect...but is my mind in the gutter, or does that creature have wiener shaped ears??}

But there are, like, lots of things in this swag bag 

and it just wouldn't be right if one girl were to keep it all that jazz to herself

{whomever she may be}

and i, my friends, am all about sharing the love!

So each day that you vote for me here 

leave me a comment below {in this post}

you can leave as many comments as you leave votes {you can vote once a day}

the more comments you leave 

the better your chance at being the lucky beneficiary to something special in the prize package

{and there will be more than one of you}

so from today until the 31st of August...

{and only if you truly think i am qualified to win this award, of course}

...freaking vote already !

also if you leave a comments here without actually voting,,,

well...that totally defeats the purpose, you know ;)

I didn't want to show you the pitiful face of my "wretched bad taste"

{which according to my computer thesaurus is another way to say "desperation"}

but as of now I am in the top three, but still pretty far behind

and the gloves have to come off

thats where you come in.

{but I promise i won't punch you in the face}

Don't let me down friends-o-boo!!

a mommy what!?!

Forgive me if I have written about this before, because right now i fall into the ambiguous territory of being merely functionally retarded. And despite my abundant free time, I am too lazy to scour my archives, so suck it up cause I am writing about it, again (?): The first time someone called me a "mommy blogger," i had the figurative reaction of looking over my shoulder to see who they were talking to.  When i turned back around and questioningly pointed to myself, the eyes were indeed on me. I'd never heard this term before. "Mommy" yes. Thousands of times a day. "blogger" yes. Reluctantly...but only because blog is such a farty sounding word. I wear both labels with pride, but together?? Something about it made me feel haggish, used, written off. Cause who really wants to know how many times I've been thrown up on? or how many days it's been since i've shaved my legs?? But last night as I very pregnant and nauseously leaned over the kitchen sink, crying, nose running, with my sweet helpless husband by my side, I knew that being a mommy is predominantly what I am.  It's not everything sure, for I am many things, but it IS a big fat amazing part of me...

(This isn't to say I think i am an amazing mother...CONFESSION: while other moms were sobbing in the school hallways, I was basically skidding out of the parking lot on my daughter's first day of kindergarden).

...but rather that I know motherhood is an amazing calling....my most important on this earth, in fact! And since blogging about it is one way i chose to connect with the world...well that makes me a "mommy blogger". There I said it. So even though i never intended to be a "M.B"....by recognition of my readers, that is the content that has predominantly, and often times ungracefully, come out of my head. And I am so totally proud of that! So whether I am deserving or not, I have been pleasantly surprised by my nomination for the Project Mommyhood: 

"Mommy blogger of the year award" 

I don't know all the details yet, but I know that voting is from Aug 15th to Aug 31st, and the winner gets a swag bag of a whole lot of mommy amazingness ;) I am SO thrilled to be up for discussion! (And even more thrilled that Sheamus finally fell asleep after and hour of crying that he wasn't tired while I tried to write this post AND email Lesley from Project Mommyhood ). So even though my brain is like scrambled eggs, i have still managed to scratch something halfway coherent here...thanks to the multitasking and selective hearing skills I've picked up throughout my seven years of motherhood. That has gotta mean something ;)

now go vote!!

famewhores unite.

  

I was nominated for a blogluxe award.

Which in itself makes my palms all clammy with discomfort.  Pitted against blogs with hundreds of readers, some over a thousand. Basically it is too late in the game for me to even come close to winning {seeing as how i have 7 votes and voting ends on the 6th.}  Believe me, I have gone back and forth on posting this button...cause to me {kinda like ginormous t-shirts with bikini bodies printed on the front} these contests exist to torture us all...with judgement. Which is something i welcome about as much as I want a sweaty indecent Antonio Sabato Jr. to demand a piggy back ride.

But as to not overlook the sweet gesture that was the nomination, i am swallowing my pride and posting it anyway. BUT...then i read over some old posts of mine.....

Now i think in general the blogging community is very kind. But I couldn't help but feel that, rather than being "funny" most of my posts read like I was storytelling half way through a mild seizure. Did I sell my soul to the devil in exchange for some awkward poop stories??...most posts are either mom style crazy and/or confusing ridiculousness, which I suppose {at this point in my life} is all i can really ask for.  So even at the risk of inviting drastic comparisons, at least check out some of the other great blogs that were nominated. And regardless if i feel my posts are funny, feel free to vote....for someone {especially NIE!}. I'll just be here...making sure i don't choke on my tongue.

*And, to pay it forward....here are some of my favorite funny ladies. check it...