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8.09.2012

unclenching in the redwoods.

If there is one question I get asked time and time again when I am recognized on the streets it's: "Hey Boo, what's your general motto for a vacation?"

Everyone wants to know! ;) And now I will tell you...


-When a 12 hour drive becomes a 16 hour drive, but not because you got to stop at all the cute picturesque spots and antique stores that you wanted to, but rather due to ridiculous Los Angeles traffic and a general unprepared slowness that is the Dike family (we are an "A" type personality's nightmare)...I say "unclench A type".





(Ferndale, CA)
yes we are playing in a cemetery   

When you do a multi family float down a river with many small children but no food or water cause it's only supposed to take one hour, but then it ends up taking 5 hours due to late afternoon winds, a weak current and janky alligator floatation devices. Then half way through, your (pants and diaper-less) baby falls asleep sitting straight up on your lap after hours of crying and you are so cold and have to pee so bad but can't in fear of reversing this small quiet miracle, even though he's probably peed on your lap at least 8 times. Then you start scanning the sides of the river bank for berries and shelter sources just in case your are stuck on this river wild forever, with Kevin Bacon undoubtedly on his way to relentlessly terrorize your family!...stop to slap yourself for being unrealistic (Kev sticks to much larger rapids) and just...
...UN-clench 
but not too much or you WILL pee on yourself

*Fun facts: After we "survived"...I peed for at least 2 minutes straight. Not even joking. Also my nephew's ears were so cold he panicked-ly asked me if they were bleeding (it was hilarious sad).






-When your kid (non baby) poops their pants on the beach and your other leaves behind their brand new pair of $30 moccasins, remember that the underwear you had to tear off their body and adorable shoes are only "things"...and then unclench your B. Beach trip memories all start to blend together without a good pants pooping.
(Lost coast)





-After you ride the 60 year old Graviton at the small town fair directly after eating rodeo nachos in the hot sun you and your Sheamus are so sick that one of you is literally crawling on the ground and the other still has to walk a mile back to Grandma's house...well...in this case you vomit (like Sheamus did in my sister's car).


(Fortuna, CA)
People are always so wound up on vacaysh (who shall remain nameless). But whenever the inevitable vacation foul comes along and you feel yourself getting a wee bit tense below the waist...you just have to UNCLENCH. I do my best to embrace the unplanned. That way my vacations aren't pure crap even if they kinda were. After all, it's the 1990's comedian-cast-as-the-dad-driving-cross-country-chalk-full-of-zany-mishaps that make the memories built to last! come what may...

team Boo 's you

4 comments:

kate said...

sonny boy is HUGE. what a cute kid! your vacation (aka:clenching/unclenching session) sounds intense and awesome all at once.

Andi said...

just happened upon your blog and with THAT post you're an instant fav. i can relate to all of it. life with kids is funny.

Megan Marie said...

love alllll of these pictures! yum.

abby said...

So when you took some time off from blogging you were taking photography classes right?! These pictures are amazing! I want all your pro tips now. Your trip looks wonderful!

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