Pages

8.26.2009

cause we've got our own boobs to look at.

A few months ago I was at the splash park with some friends where there was a lady who had her new baby in a sling. he was obviously hungry (as babies tend to unremittingly be) and much to this baby's delight...he had a vip ticket to "perma snack" which co-incided with his mommy's giant (and i mean giant) lady lumps being slung out for all to see. for the entire two hours we played! (including when the baby slept) Now maybe i was being prejudiced...because I have a very low tolerance for adults who sport pigtails (which she was)...so just to be clear that i am not one of those people who will stare you down in a restaurant if your kid so much as sneezes, I will list off a few things she might validly use in her defense:

-nursing is a wonderful natural part of life
-it's possible her chafed nips were having a cotton aversion
-it was hotttttt
-maybe she likes tan boobs (and tan babies)
-she couldn't care less what the judgmental mom groups were saying ;)

I nurse...my boobs get out of control ginormous. I nurse in public. (As a rule babies eat and have poop explosions at the most inopportune times) But I also know there is usually a way to be a little more discrete. Please ladies continue to nurse...and not only locked away in some 1950's mothers lounge, don't let any yuppy boob snob tell you any otherwise. But please, for the love of all ten year old boys wandering eyes...the wonder of your lactating miracles should stay shrouded in mystery.
and here is where i tell you how...really, this was just my very round about way of telling
nursing or soon to be nursing mothers that:

Udder Covers will work wonders for those pesky water park scenarios. One comfy strap over your piggy tailed head and voila!...you are all set to keep those puppies in check.

(oh, also resist the urge to wear pigtails)


12 comments:

boots said...

I just voted like a million times. and i agree with you completely. I don't know why anyone would want to display their engorged lady parts to just anyone, These udder covers are really cute too. they are all on back order so i think i will make one of my own for my very prego friend. thanks!

Kelsie said...

i love that they are called udder covers. makes me chuckle. i voted

Hobbie said...

I'm glad you touched on this subject. And I agree with you, in public is fine, but cover up! Not too long ago I read an entire blog post(by someone who has no kids) that went on about how gross breastfeeding was in public covered or not! I couldn't believe it. I mean everyone can have their own opinion, but would they rather you cover up and feed your baby or listen to a starving baby scream for food until the mother can get to an "appropriate place"? Anyway thatnks for the heads up on the uddercovers. BTW, I'm voting for you everyday:)

Kimi said...

My sister-in-law made me a "hooter hider" when I was preggo. It was fantastic, even though I'm not much of a public nurser. Do pigtail braids count as pigtails, cause if so...dang. I'm weeping, lol

Renee said...

The truth is, I sport the pigtails, and I'm not here to apologize for it. When you're hair is too short for a ponytail, you do what must be done.

However, I AM commenting to say that I love that you created a picture moment, probably JUST for the sake of getting her picture. That might be my favorite thing to do, because it involves covertness and trickery and trying to not to crack up, all great things. (I tried it with Ron Jeremy at Disneyland once, and it wasn't NEARLY this subtle).

Also, also, I think one of those friends of Boo used to be my visiting teacher.

(and I voted so you can be the winner)

Logan said...

Meh, no one has a problem with topless men. Society needs to become more relaxed about our bodies and the stigmas will go away.

Annie Harper said...

My sister has one of these, but hers is called a Hooter Hider. Brilliant. Best invention ever!

Carolyn said...

The thing about having a baby is that modesty goes out the window. I've been there twice before and you think your gonna care during labor...you don't. you think you'll want to cover up when your trying to nurse, but when the baby won't latch and is freaking out you'd welcome any hand that could help....I did.

As survival the mother's standards of discretion must be lowered...but then time goes by and you remember again how much other people still don't feel as comfortable around your lady bidness as the mother is at showing it. Its a fine line. I am never horrified to see a breast..but if i had to choose, i'd choose the fabric swatch.

thanks for your feedback!

kelly said...

thanks for the low-down, team boo! i cant wait to hide my hooters behind one of these free bad boys.

Gogo said...

I am, like, voting so hard. :-) Really,though. I hope you win.

JLang said...

Thought it was time I checked out your blog since you always leave such clever comments on Steoffrey's blog. And how could I not vote for you when you asked so nicely? And. . . . I think you deserve to win if for no other reason than the fact that you just made it through the "lay on the couch and die" phase of pregnancy. I promise to go back and vote as many times as I can remember, which isn't saying much since I'm kind of old and don't remember things unless I write them down. I don't want to make you feel bad, but pregnancy kills brain cells, and they never come back even when your kids are older and married and having kids of their own.
Oh, and I loved the boobie post and the way you segwayed (is that a word, maybe I just spelled it wrong) into the info on the udder cover.

Candice Noel and Brickton John said...

AMEN Sista. It was a tough day and you seriously made me laugh out loud in a quiet library...And I'm not even embarrassed because it was totally worth it! THANK YOU!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...