passive me aggressive you

Sometimes when a guy walks wingmanless into a conversation of girls i like to immediately switch the conversation topic to tampons. First of all it gives even the cleverest of men an immediate temporary lobotomy. Second, it never takes more than three seconds for them to see themselves right out of the convo for higher and less awkward ground (which I always find hilarious).

Like men and menstruation, my soul has a similar reaction to the looming reality of "routine". But every new school year we meet again like dueling idiots (actually routine is smart and winning and i am the dummy) Instead of realizing how much simpler it can make my life and accepting it's practicality, i tense up and become useless. Or like the tampon fearing men I know, when a schedule starts to take form, i walk in the opposite direction to "somewhere i was gonna go anyway" but then I accidentally take a nap or something.

Last week my kids started the daily grind of school (suckers). And next week so will I (super sucker). Poetic timing considering the fact that I spelled "Kindergarten" wrong on Sheamus's sign. holy smokes.

For me this yearly tradition is a blessing and a curse...Curse? I feel guilt for not managing my now fractioned time with them perfectly. Or for getting up every morning before my body wills it so. Or for having to crack the whip on their freedom to play by enforcing daily chores, reading, homework and bedtimes. Boring!...but it must be done, or they'll become lazy stupes yadda yadda.

Blessing? T-I-M-E. Time to chip away at my own schooling, work my shleppy body back out of my "thanksgiving" pants, spend some one on one with my sonny boy, and do a few projects. And of course the fact that my kids are lucky enough to be out getting an education.  Away from the mom who talks about tampons to be intentionally awkward and misspelled Kindergarten :)

hooray for school.
team Boo 's you


Renee said...

Yours kids have awesome back to school outfits. I love 'em.

Good luck on going back to school. One back-to-school tip: when you have to go to the bathroom, and you take your purse/satchel, but leave your notebook and pen, everyone knows you've got your moon blood. No way around it, sister.

That one was free.

robin said...

so funny...

and you're going back to school?

cara. said...

what are you studying? and also, can we start a joint fund where one of us gets to the other person? i could promise maybe a dollar a month, at least.

Brissa said...

i love their outfits. do you think elyott would let me borrow hers for my first day? how exciting on you heading to school! have you decided what you're studying yet?
ooh, and before i forget, sheamus' kicks are amazing. they make me want a pair.

kelly said...

ha. this post made me laugh out loud like three times. i good one boo.

congraduations on going back to school.

get it...i spelled congraduations wrong just for you.

chelsey meyer said...

going back to school?? good for you lady!

MaryPosa said...

I've been on an Internet hiatus, so glad to return to find that you are still hilarious. :)
Misspellings aside, the pictures of your kids are quite adorable, and I can't wait to hear about your school adventure.

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